Frequency and Timing of Sex in Order to Conceive

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When couples first fall in love, they crave intimacy and find plenty of time for making love. Sadly, as the years go by and other priorities emerge, love making can become quite infrequent even for couples who are still in love. We are led to believe that couples have sex on average twice or three times each week but my research has led me to discover that many infertile couples only make love once a month in the hope that they can conceive. Is this enough sex if you are trying to conceive and if so, when should you make love in order to maximise your chances of conceiving?


There are many reasons why it's not a good idea to work with the only once a month regime. One is that this creates incredible stress for both partners and very often the man is unable to gain an erection. Stress itself greatly reduces the chances of conception so given the other major problem of getting the timing right, once a month is a seriously bad choice! Regular sex also plays an important role in preparing the woman's body for conception so there are many reasons to increase the frequency of your love-making; at least during the most fertile week. There have been many books written on how to increase desire but you need to understand how to how to create extra time as well as desire. There are also many other mistakes in love making that can prevent conceiving: for example you must make sure that you are not using an inappropriate lubricant should you need one.

Some couples lead such complex lives involving travel and shift work that finding time for intimacy is really difficult. If for some good reason other than lack of desire, there is only the chance for one occasion of sex per month, when should this be? Well the answer is a bit awkward because the best time for this single occasion of sex should be 36 to 24 hours before ovulation.This means that you must know when ovulation is due but that using expensive measures of ovulation is a waste of money because its too late. Unless your 'conception technique' is near perfect, if you have sex after ovulation, it is almost certain to be too late. So waiting to measure ovulation is likely to miss the optimal time for intercourse.

To understand your cycle, you will need to keep a Basal Temperature Chart and modify your lifestyle until your cycle is regular and predictable. Once you have a regular cycle, you can throw the thermometer away because you will know each month just when you ovulate and you can then easily judge exactly when to have sex to optimise your chances of conception. Irregular cycles don't prevent conception entirely but they are an indication that the woman's body is not working as well as possible. Optimising the cycle by regulating all aspects of lifestyle will also reduce the risks of miscarriage and other problems. It's worth doing this even if you intend to have lots of sex.